How was your day? Some weather we’re having, huh?Do you ever get the crippling feeling that we’re all just small beings being contained to one universe as a science project?
I hate small talk. So much so, that I will take someone’s small talk question and have a full blown existential crisis within the answer. That will teach you to ask me about my day carol.
Also, why is my go-to fake name almost always always carol? Like I could be talking about any scenario man or woman, and the names I go to are Carlos, Keith, Susan, and Carol.
I should really write these scenarios down. These four fuckers have a really wild life.
SEE HOW UNCOMFORTABLE SMALL TALK MAKES ME? I just went on a tangent about fake names to get away from the talk about small talk.
I mean, am I alone in this? I can’t be the only one that hates small talk with a vengeance. I also can’t be the only person to fuck with someone that tries to initiate small talk.
Let’s break down how I fuck with people, shall we?
Carol: hey, how are you?
Me: I mean, good, I can’t complain, except for the fact that it’s so hot out I actually think I might be dead already.
Me: like I might actually be dead, this could all be a death dream. Do you think those are real? Or like what do you think happens to your thoughts, do they die with you? Man death is going to be boring if that’s the case.
Carol: yeah.. anyway, it was good seeing you. I’ll, uh, text you.
In hindsight, maybe this is why I only have a few friends. Either way. Small talk is bullshit.
Have a real conversation with me or get the fuck out Carol.